Self Love Reminder Mantras for Valentine’s Day

Happy Valentine’s Day, friends!

I hope you all had time to print and deliver some Feminist Valentine’s to your loved ones.

For past Valentine posts I’ve written about the importance of self-love and I continue to feel strongly about our abilities to love others being most powerful when we first know and love ourselves.

Today I thought I’d share some reminders to help with a little self-care. On a day when our social media platforms are filled with pictures of chocolates and flowers and silly declarations of superficial love, let’s focus on caring for our own hearts for a while too.


You are Loved

I promise that you are. Your friends and family all know that you’re a gem. Not to mention, if you’re reading my blog, then I for sure love you.

You are Allowed to Take Up Space

In our culture where we’re constantly told to be smaller, thinner, quieter, nicer, this might be my favourite mantra to repeat to myself. Whether you’re surrounded by bigger voices or faster speakers, or anyone really, just remember that your body and your brain are also valid and important.

When it comes to physical space I often practice this idea in line ups. If the person behind me is standing just a little too close, or leaning a little much, (and it’s almost always men), I turn around slightly. When you face someone it’s a reminder that you’re human. I plant my feet and put my hands on my hips, turning enough to create more space. It might sound silly but it works!

Your Ideas are Interesting

As an introvert I often have many more ideas flying around in my head than I actually ever articulate or express and, obvi, not ALL ideas are good ones. It still bears repeating as a reminder that you have valuable thoughts that are worth contributing.

You Have a Beautiful Heart

Now, this one I know is definitely true and definitely important to remind yourself of. You are allowed to feel good about being you. You can contribute to the world in wonderful ways. You belong.


Now, go eat some chocolate my Valentines!



This Valentines Day, Remember to Love Thyself

This Saturday I had the pleasure of attending a delightful little get-together with some open-minded gal pals. Over the mantle of the host’s home hung bunting that read “Love Thyself.” In addition to the candy and chatter of a regular soirée, this party also featured a particularly unusual guest of honour: Shannon from Halifax’s Venus Envy.

If you haven’t been, Venus Envy is located on Barrington St. in downtown Halifax. The store is equipped with products and books – from educational to fun – to service the many facets of sexual health, well-being, relationships, and pleasure, and, though I have yet to attend, they also host workshops and informational events.

On Saturday, Shannon arrived equipped with sexual knowledge, a welcoming attitude, and a trunk full of toys both naughty and sweet. The atmosphere was casual and fun. There was no judgement passed and questions were welcomed and responded to with insight. At the end of the night, the guests were free to peruse the goodies and make purchases, if so inclined. I’ve never been to a Tupperware party, but you can imagine it was like that, but if the Tupperware vibrated.

What a privilege it is now, amidst all the slut-shamming, harassment, anti-feminists, and online misogynist trolls, to find myself a bit of community where women’s sexual preferences, exploits, and decisions, are respected and encouraged.

If you’re also fortunate enough to live in a relatively safe space, celebrate! Take advantage of your freedom! Take that freedom all the way to your bedroom! And if you’re thinking you’d rather save your “alone time” for after Valentine’s Day, then here’s to sharing it with a partner who will love you the way you deserve (consensually)!

Here are some free printable valentines that I made. You can give them to a friend, a partner, or just keep them for yourself.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

valentine consent

valentine charmKrista